My body isn't built for it. It's especially not built for it when my blood sugar crashes and gives me headaches, makes me feel fucking hungry all the time and ruins my concentration.
I can't sleep. Fortunately, I just discovered True Blood and my thought of the day is:
"I have gout of the dick."
Clearly this is my (lack of) blood sugar talking. God, I cacked myself when I heard that.
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Monday, October 4, 2010
Cemil is feeling tired...
Man my blood sugar problem is really starting to kill me. I bull rushed through 2 chapters over the weekend but didn't actively realise that I basically just wrote 1 chapter and split them into 2 just to make it look like I did more work. I actually did write 2 chapters and they were decent enough I suppose, but my normal chapter length is 3500-4000 words. I wrote 2000 a pop.
I can fill those out though no problem.
But man, this blood sugar thing is killing my drive to work. My ability to concentrate - it's all shot to tell.
Oh well. ALSO in my novel class last night I think half the class stared daggers of death at me. I was telling them about my work experience and we were talking about how to write a submission for your novel. All well and good and the teacher asks me the question:
Were you in a position to reject their submissions? And I answered straight away: Yes. And I rejected most of them.
Dead silence. Eye lasers hit my face.
Someone asked me why and the reality of it was, that most of the submissions I saw were total shit penned by people who thought they could do what I do professionally on the weekend between their regular day jobs. Writing is not a game, it's not a thing for hacks to pick up and glut the industry with. But the reality is that they do and they do it by the truckload and it's total ratshit.
What people don't realise is that writing is one of the hardest, most grueling processes you can put yourself through. It takes determination and a fine understanding of craft. An understanding that can take years to develop - I've been professionally trained to do this and I have a lot of things to learn about this gig.
But the only thing that is clear about the writing biz is that it's a lot of hard yards with almost no payoff until the end. And maybe, just maybe, you'll become the next big thing. That's the career I've chosen. I'm probably never going to be rich or famous or anything. But god damn it I am going to get published. I am going to get my book done. And I am going to become an editor.
I can fill those out though no problem.
But man, this blood sugar thing is killing my drive to work. My ability to concentrate - it's all shot to tell.
Oh well. ALSO in my novel class last night I think half the class stared daggers of death at me. I was telling them about my work experience and we were talking about how to write a submission for your novel. All well and good and the teacher asks me the question:
Were you in a position to reject their submissions? And I answered straight away: Yes. And I rejected most of them.
Dead silence. Eye lasers hit my face.
Someone asked me why and the reality of it was, that most of the submissions I saw were total shit penned by people who thought they could do what I do professionally on the weekend between their regular day jobs. Writing is not a game, it's not a thing for hacks to pick up and glut the industry with. But the reality is that they do and they do it by the truckload and it's total ratshit.
What people don't realise is that writing is one of the hardest, most grueling processes you can put yourself through. It takes determination and a fine understanding of craft. An understanding that can take years to develop - I've been professionally trained to do this and I have a lot of things to learn about this gig.
But the only thing that is clear about the writing biz is that it's a lot of hard yards with almost no payoff until the end. And maybe, just maybe, you'll become the next big thing. That's the career I've chosen. I'm probably never going to be rich or famous or anything. But god damn it I am going to get published. I am going to get my book done. And I am going to become an editor.
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Cemil is feeling accomplished...
So, I've had a busy couple of weeks. Been working my ass off for two weeks at a publishing house AND I got two chapters done this weekend in time for Novel class on monday night. All in all, I've had a pretty satisfying couple of weeks. Certainly I feel vindicated for my experiences and the amount of work I've put in.
Unfortunately, I've put myself behind on my school work. It's nothing insurmountable. An essay that's admittedly not very long on two short stories I've read before and considered previously. I need to analyse the symbolism and how it talks about the barriers we put between ourselves.
Then I have to finish that awful novel I've been reading: The Master and the Margherita by Bulgakov. The devil take him.
THEN I need to go through a giant chunck of text and make a style sheet out of all the little details in it. Joy. But I've got at least a week to do the essay and the style sheet. That should be easy enough.
IF I can jump this hurdle then I am satisfied that I can manage all of my projects and get them done on time. I certainly hope so - typing two chapters in a weekend has given me a great deal of confidence. Maybe I can get a significant chunk of my novel done before the end of the term and feel somewhere approaching to proud of myself.
I don't actually...do that very often. I hold the strange belief that I am capable of stupendous amounts of fine work. Or something. I dunno? My particular brand of stupid isn't something I can control. I just don't know how to be happy with myself and the brief moments of satisfaction I do feel are fleeting. Alas, I'll just have to bust my balls and get the damn book done and then redrafted and published.
Then the world will be mine!
Unfortunately, I've put myself behind on my school work. It's nothing insurmountable. An essay that's admittedly not very long on two short stories I've read before and considered previously. I need to analyse the symbolism and how it talks about the barriers we put between ourselves.
Then I have to finish that awful novel I've been reading: The Master and the Margherita by Bulgakov. The devil take him.
THEN I need to go through a giant chunck of text and make a style sheet out of all the little details in it. Joy. But I've got at least a week to do the essay and the style sheet. That should be easy enough.
IF I can jump this hurdle then I am satisfied that I can manage all of my projects and get them done on time. I certainly hope so - typing two chapters in a weekend has given me a great deal of confidence. Maybe I can get a significant chunk of my novel done before the end of the term and feel somewhere approaching to proud of myself.
I don't actually...do that very often. I hold the strange belief that I am capable of stupendous amounts of fine work. Or something. I dunno? My particular brand of stupid isn't something I can control. I just don't know how to be happy with myself and the brief moments of satisfaction I do feel are fleeting. Alas, I'll just have to bust my balls and get the damn book done and then redrafted and published.
Then the world will be mine!
Saturday, October 2, 2010
Cemil is celebrating...
Collingwood won the Premiership. Best belated birthday present ever. I'm going to have to cheer with Ray and Katy on monday about it. I already spent half the morning reading, watching and talking to my best mate about how awesome it was.
And I managed to type the most part of a chapter during the game. That's how comitted I am to my writing folks, writing books during a grand final...
At which point I stopped writing and watched the game. Oh my god that was fantastic!!! :D :D :D
Alright, gotta get back to my grindstone ladies and gents. See you soon.
OH AND GEORGE I have a plan how to make all of this up to you. I am going to start reading your book and then we can catch up for coffee every so often and chat about it.
And I managed to type the most part of a chapter during the game. That's how comitted I am to my writing folks, writing books during a grand final...
At which point I stopped writing and watched the game. Oh my god that was fantastic!!! :D :D :D
Alright, gotta get back to my grindstone ladies and gents. See you soon.
OH AND GEORGE I have a plan how to make all of this up to you. I am going to start reading your book and then we can catch up for coffee every so often and chat about it.
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